I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
