dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
