So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Randomize
