if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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