grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
