there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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