..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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