Porn is love you can see.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
