i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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