Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Randomize
