In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
