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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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