i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Randomize
