So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Hippo gnu deer
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
