So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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