Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
