isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize
