we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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