Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
