I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize