I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
