he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
