what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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