Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
how does that bad decision feel?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
