That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize