you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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