I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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