so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
