I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize