I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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