Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just found puke in my bra..
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
