i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
How's work?
Spinning.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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