your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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