shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
