The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
