so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Randomize
