its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
