Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
