I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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