I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize
