i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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