I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
All I want is dick and wine.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
