like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Two words: blizzard sex
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
