I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize