Having a random hookup so left but love u
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
