what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
