she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize