I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
