i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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