Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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